Tag: Love

Trust is the Foundation

According to Andy Stanley, these verses from 1 Corinthians 13 are historically used for marriage vows; yet they were established as a guideline for us to love people.
I want to share the points he made which are critical for us to understand to know what this looks like and how to apply it!

The health of all relationships flows out of how we trust people! This will be determined on two things:
1. What we see
2. Who we are
Trust verses from this scripture
Verses 5-6
“Love delights in those doing the right thing”
verse 7
“Love always protects, hopes and perseveres”
1. Love protects the relationship – when it is the hardest, do everything to trust
2. Hope is the explanation of that
3. Love believes and endures all things
Summary is LOVE BENDS!
1.It gives the other person the benefit of the doubt
2. It always looks for the most generous explanation
3. Love chooses trust over suspicion

The core of great relationships is TRUST
WE all have expectations and experiences. But what is in the middle of those?
I love how Andy put it that there is a gap there and WE CHOOSE what to do in that gap
When we find ourselves seeing behavior that causes a gap, what do we do? WE CHOOSE–If we CHOOSE TRUST (Believing the Best) that is love. LOVE BENDS!
Andy shared much more . . .

Summary –
LOVE BENDS – DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO TO YOU. Luke 6:31
When you can’t choose to trust, LOVE CONFRONTS, but not in a mean way. Only through a loving, respectful, kind and gentle way!
Go to the person, share that you want to trust them, you want to understand and you keep the door open to the relationship.
If we do nothing, anger develops internally and becomes embedded to the point the relationship is severed. A wise man will BEND!

Five points Jesus asks us to commit to:
1. When you see the gap – I will believe the best
2. When Others assume the worst about you- I will come to your defense
3. If trust is eroding by experience – I will come directly to you
4. When I cant keep a promise – I will let you know ahead of time
5. When you confront me about gaps I have created – I’m going to tell you the truth!

These are great commitments for each of us to make.

THE FOUNDATION OF ALL RELATIONSHIPS IS TRUST!

My Mom is Love

From my perspective my mother is the most wonderful mother God could have blessed me with. She is a light of love, patient and humble, very wise, industrious and creative. My mom is a woman who speaks the truth in a gentle, yet penetrating way, driving to the very core of my heart. My mom is simple at heart, yet there is a unique beauty in her, a magnificent beauty that reflects into others lives. She is a jewel that stands out in the crowd. Her eyes are blue, full of light and depth. Her smile invites acceptance and her heart steers one to live life to the fullest. My mom is love.

When I was a teenager, I did not think this much of my mom’s guidance. I thought I knew all the answers and that I knew far better for my life than she could know. Oddly, during all those years, when anyone said anything against my mom, I quickly came to her defense. The experiences in my life of my mom speaking truth to me were not easy and as a teenager caused me to sometimes resent her. Those resentments and pains turned into an understanding that although I was wrong in some things, my mom loved me enough to tell me the truth about myself, which spurred me into a deeper relationship with God and her.

Once I recognized that my mother had my best interest in her heart I saw things in a different way. I began to mature and recognize that my thinking had changed and I longed for more of the wisdom my mother offered. She is a woman who allowed me to live out my life and learn from whatever mistakes I would make. She came through life in the same way. If I had not had the mother God so carefully chose for me, I would never have received the love, encouragement and lessons only she could give.  I became the woman I am because of my mother’s gifts of love and truth.

I am thankful I woke up and put away childish thinking while realizing what an absolute blessing my mom is to all of my sisters, my daughters, my grandchildren and me. Without her guidance, acceptance and love we would not have sought the love that was sitting in the palm of our hands, even though we could not see it.

Thank you mom for guiding me, for believing in me and mostly for loving me! I am grateful you are the mother God chose for me! I love you!

Forgiveness from Love

Last August, I attended the “Grand New Day” conference put on by Women of Faith. Steve Arterburn’s sister, Marilyn, spoke about pre-marital counseling. She told an interesting story, which I hope I recall the details of to share with you.

Lester and Lucy were a couple who had recently married and as they were getting all moved in to their new home, Lester commented about all the boxes they each possessed. Lucy asked Lester what was inside of all his boxes and he answered that it was just “stuff.” She said, “Let’s play a game. Let’s open a box and take one piece of “stuff” out of the box and talk about that one piece.”  So, Lester agreed and proceeded to open a box taking out a piece of “stuff.”The first piece of stuff was a gift he had received from his mother years ago. He told Lucy all about the conflict in his relationship with his mother, and how at a young age he left home, lied about his age and enrolled in the army.  When he was at strongest odds with his mom and away on duty, he met and married a girl from whom he was now divorced.  “Oh . . .” Lucy said slowly and surprised. Then Lester wanted Lucy to share a piece of “stuff.” In agreement, she pulled out her piece of “stuff,” which was a photograph of herself and two of her high school friends. She began to tell Lester about the girls.  “When I was a girl I got pregnant and my two friends helped me get an abortion . . .”  Before she could finish her story, Lester was already backing away from her.  He could not believe what he was hearing, “An abortion?”

In the beginning of the story Lester and Lucy were doing pretty well freely giving grace to one another, but when things came out that were shocking to the other, Lester began to back away, just like he had done with his mother and previous wife.

This story can resonate in so many of our own lives. All we need to do is change the names. There are so many wounds that we carry in our own hearts causing us to respond to other people’s heartache from a condemning and judgmental attitude. Somehow we get it into our heads that we are better than the other person. This is a false truth that we are living in. I love the scripture that teaches us to “Take the LOG out of your own eye before you attempt to remove a SPECK from another persons eye.”  Those words alone should ring deep within each of our hearts. How many times have you said, “Look at her, thinking she looks so good” or “I can’t believe she is doing that, I would NEVER do that” and then you find yourself two weeks later, doing exactly what you said you would not do!

I am thankful we have a merciful God and He forgives us for the absolute rubbish that comes from our mouths. There was a time in my life where it did not matter what came out of my mouth. I freely spoke, criticized and made fun of people. Praise God that He has a way to tame that little muscle in our mouths training it, through the heart, to speak on things that are pure and lovely and encouraging, trustworthy, noble, uplifting and praiseworthy (see Philippians 4:8).

We read throughout the scriptures, that when Jesus Christ endured the cross and died a sinners death, we were forgiven of our wrongs and trespasses against God. What is it that prevents many from believing God? We are forgiven! It is left in our hands to accept His forgiveness. God will never force that upon us. In the same way that we are forgiven, we are to forgive others. In fact, the scriptures tell us in very specific words, when you forgive another of his wrongs, he is forgiven in the sight of God!

“If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent—not to put it too severely.  The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient.  Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.  I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.” 2 Corinthians 2:5-7 (NIV)

Suggested Scripture Reading: Luke 6:42; 2 Corinthians 2:5-7; Matthew 6:12

The Gift of Life! Oh How He Loves Us!

When I think about Jesus Christ coming to this earth, I am continuously reminded how special each one of us is to Him.  Jesus came to earth and died on the cross for us, to give us freedom – LIFE. He did it for one reason, because He loves us! Thank you Jesus! You are unchanging in Love, Truth and Faithfulness for yesterday, today and tomorrow!

I stay in awe that Jesus chose us to die for. I mean, we are people who are running around usually seeking our own pleasure, while sometimes hurting others in the process. But even in our self-way of thinking, Jesus came and died for YOU and ME! That is beautiful love! A love so strong that He laid down His own life and willingly went to the cross. He did not run away or try to escape from the hand of those who would kill him. He willingly went to the cross knowing He would die.

After Jesus died, with the weight of the world upon his shoulders, He was resurrected and ascended into heaven to reign at the throne! He is the High Priest, the One and Only True God who loves us! All come to the Father through Him!

Thank you Jesus for your jealous love of us! The gift of life~only by Jesus Christ!

“For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Peter and then to the Twelve. After that, he appeared to more than five hundred of the brothers at the same time, most of whom are still living, though some have fallen asleep.” 1 Corinthians 15:3-8

Keep Your Eye on the Ball

I stood outside the gated area watching a team of precious little six-year-olds making some of their first attempts at batting a ball being pitched to them. They were so cute in their uniforms. They had all the appeal of one who knew exactly what they were doing being dressed to the nines in the black socks, white pants, jerseys with their names, batting helmets and a bat fitted perfectly to their small grasp.

When the coach would pitch the ball he would give gentle instructions to each team member who was “up” for his turn to practice some pre-game batting. I watched each one as they would concentrate to make contact happen between with their bat and the oncoming ball.  Each time the coach pitched and the ball would come toward them, they would swing either too soon or too late.

After a couple of strikes, the coach would slowly approach the child, get down on his level and tell the little boy what a great job he was doing. He would also say to him, “Keep your eye on the ball. If you do this one thing, you will hit it.” He would then gently pat him on the shoulder while giving him a smile and a last word of, “Okay, let’s make this happen.” As the coach would resume the pitcher’s plate, the little boy would move into the right stance and begin rocking his weight from one leg to the other, just as if he were a professional league player. It was precious to me, especially because one of the little boys I was watching is Noah, my first grandson.

The third time up to bat, Noah did not take his eyes off the ball. No matter what distractions were around him, he stayed focused. More than four times in a row, he hit the ball beyond his coaches reach!! His coach acknowledged his success by cheering him on and giving him a high-five. Noah was proud of what he had accomplished! You could see the esteem and confidence beaming from his face!

Having a coach like this in the world of little league baseball is rare. I am thankful my grandson has a coach like him, who will encourage and build up my grandson and other little children. I am also grateful that he is setting an example of what mentoring and teaching others looks like. Hopefully, my grandson will grow up with some of those same qualities his coach is teaching him at a young and impressionable age.

As adults, without a team to cheer us on in our endeavors, we can begin to feel defeated. If we are aware of the need to surround ourselves with positive people, we have a greater advantage for success. No longer children and without our parents making sure we stay on track, it is our responsibility to take the necessary steps to make sure we have our own cheerleaders helping us to keep our eye on the ball and accomplishing our goals.